I'm Right, You're Wrong - Does It Even Matter?
I was having a conversation with someone recently. This person is very dear to me, but we don't often see eye to eye. I started to feel frustrated as her beliefs are the stark opposite of my own. I voiced my take on the subject, she voiced hers. We were at an impasse, both feeling flustered, and we finally agreed to each their own.
It can come up in any conversation, that difference in opinion. How I see things and how you see things that are at opposite ends of the spectrum. What’s true for me is not true for you and vice versa. So, who’s right? More importantly, does being right even matter in the grand scheme of things? We tend to, whether consciously or unconsciously, tie our identity to our beliefs which is a big part of why we’ll defend them tooth and nail. We are each allowed our own beliefs, so why do we sometimes feel the need to impose them onto others? Usually, it’s to reinforce our identity.
“I’m right, you’re wrong.” What if, just what if, you’re not right, or maybe you’re only partly right? We’re usually caught up defending a few pixels when there’s a much bigger picture. It’s like we’re only seeing pieces of a puzzle and think we know what the full design is. We may even be absolutely convinced that we know what the design is. That is, until we come across a puzzle piece that doesn’t fit with our view. It is then that we start to consider that maybe we’re not so sure of the design or that there's something more to it.
Just because something is not in our awareness, or in our life experience, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Just because something goes against our way of thinking, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong. Our reality is created by what we’re focusing on and the meaning we give it. The meaning we give it is influenced by our beliefs. The kicker is, many of our beliefs aren't even our own. They are beliefs we took on from our family, friends, teachers, religious doctrines, and society in general. When someone challenges your beliefs, instead of automatically getting upset, or offended, question where your belief comes from. Is it yours? Do you actually believe it 100%? Could there be a few % of wiggle room that allows for further exploration?
The Earth was known to be flat - until Aristotle and Eratosthenes contended that, from their observations, the Earth is a sphere. Galileo was charged with heresy by the Catholic Church for claiming that the Earth revolves around the sun. This countered the posture of the church which maintained that the sun and other planets revolve around the Earth. Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis, who discovered the importance of hand washing between patients and the cleaning of medical equipment, was ousted and ignored. Doctors and surgeons did not incorporate these practices until the late 1800’s. What was believed to be reality was changed by those who challenged it, by those who took us outside of the box.
The egg — for years there have been arguments over whether it’s healthy or not, and whether it’s the white or the yolk that’s better for you. Then there’s pasteurized milk versus unpasteurized milk. Dare I mention the debate on vaccines? Whenever we read or refer to a scientific study, it’s important to consider if it’s looking at the bigger picture or is it just focusing on one aspect? Who paid for that study? Is it peer-reviewed? What are other similar studies saying? Even with the news, are they giving you the facts so that you can construct your own opinion, or are they pushing an agenda? Are they telling you what to believe? And then there's social media - from those who actually know what they're taking about based on their own experience to those who are there for the vanity clicks and are spouting whatever will draw people to their posts. It’s so incredibly important to question. It’s why we have critical thinking skills in the first place.
For those who rely so heavily on science, it’s important to remember that science isn’t fixed. It’s always changing as there are new discoveries. Since I deal with the non-physical, I’m often countered with, “According to science, that can’t be true.” I simply say, “Science hasn’t caught up yet.” I’m not negating the importance of science by any means. Science requires curiosity and the willingness to challenge standing beliefs through new observations. Science definitely has its place, it’s just not the be-all end-all.
We are all experiencing life in different ways. We see it through our predisposed lens of limited understanding. How I see things is different from how you do. How I have experienced the world is different from how you have. The cool thing is, we can always change the lens. It’s all about being curious, expanding, stretching beyond our comfort zone and outside of our box of knowledge. We aren’t aware of what we’re not aware of until we’re aware of it. Even with awareness, we get to decide what that means to us. The next time you’re in a disagreement over whatever the topic may be, hear them out. That doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them. It’s helpful to see things from another perspective. I know many of my beliefs have changed and evolved over time. That’s what we’re meant to do as a species, evolve.
Heart Hugs, Adrienne :)
