How to Let Go When It Feels Like You Can’t
I will never forget the time a wonderful friend of mine and I were talking about letting go and moving forward. Since I'm someone who helps others let go of their energetic and emotional blockages and limiting beliefs, I couldn't figure out why I was still struggling. Even with so many tools at my disposal that I'd learned over the years, there were still some things that were really hard for me to let go of.
I remember she held out her hand and said, "Imagine I'm holding a pencil. It's light, not a big deal. Now, imagine how it feels to hold it for a long time - it gets heavy. So, what do you do? You let go."
I'd heard of this analogy before, and it's a great way to understand that the longer you hold onto something - the heavier it gets and weighs you down, even to the point where it becomes unwanted emotional baggage. The reason why it's so hard to let go is due to the emotional resistance we carry around the issue.
An example from my own experience would be when a good friend of mine completely cut me out of her life when I stepped into my intuitive gifts. Years of friendship down the drain because I was becoming someone she could no longer accept. It was painful and bothered me for years.
The anger, sadness, disbelief, rejection, and resentment I was feeling were what helped keep that "pencil" firmly in my grip.
I turned to my friend and asked, "But what do you do with the "pencil" that's too hard to let go of? Or the "pencil" that you want more than anything to let go of, but there's something holding you back from dropping it?"
My wise friend said, "That's easy; the key to letting go is to reach for something else."
What a lightbulb moment! I'd been doing the inner work that helped me loosen my grip, but I hadn't thought past the desire to just let go. I realized that my energy and my attention needed to shift towards reaching for something else - something that would bring my heart joy.
If you find yourself in a similar situation. I invite you to try the following:
Pick up a pencil that will represent what/who you're trying to let go of/move on from.
On a piece of paper, using the pencil, write down the emotions that keep coming up around that issue. Allow yourself some time to let them all bubble up and then write them down. Once you've finished, crumble that piece of paper into a ball.
Now, think about what it is that you'd like to reach for (a new relationship, a new job, more inner peace, self-love...) and what that would feel like. Try to come up with 3 positive emotions.
With the balled-up piece of paper in one hand and the pencil in the other, toss them over your shoulders behind you. You're throwing them back to the past.
In front of you, turn your hands over, palms facing upwards to receive. Envision that you are gratefully accepting that which you're reaching for.
Bring your hands to your heart and for 30 seconds, feel one of the positive emotions as if you already have what you're reaching for.
As for the piece of paper - you can throw it away or burn it. Once the emotions are removed, the pencil is just a pencil. Do as you will with it. If you still feel some charge around it, repeat the process with a new piece of paper.
If you've tried the process a few times and find it's still not helping, there is deeper work that needs to be done. There may be a story identity that needs addressed or limiting beliefs that need cleared. I can help you with the deeper release work in a 1:1 virtual energy clearing session.
When you're looking to drop a stubborn issue that's been hard to let go of, remember to R.E.A.C.H. - Release your Emotional Attachments while Choosing Happiness.
If you make the conscious choice to allow the past to live in the past and to choose happiness in the present, it will become easier to drop the "pencil." From there, it's about taking action to step towards that "something else" and into greater joy.
Heart Hugs,
Adrienne
